I can’t wait for spring flowers to start blooming in my yard. I’m anxious to start planting a multitude of colors… and move away from my tendency to plant mostly pinks and burgandys out front. I want to infuse my gardens with color… with life. I see hope for this spring’s blooms, and looking forward to it with great excitement.

Perhaps it’s the time of year. Perhaps it’s because of circumstances. I had to have a stress test last Thursday. I did good, until I got to the end of the test when my heart rate changed and put me into a sinus arrhythmia. The nurses and ultrasound tech who were with me called Dr. Wonderful into the room, and he ordered an ambulance and started an IV with drugs to get my heart back where it needed to be. He massaged my carotid artery, and the drugs he administered brought my heart back into rhythm. My blood pressure went really high, so I’m on a new med (Avapro) for that. I have to take it easy until my appointment with him on Monday the 27th. By then he will have had a chance to review all my results, see how the Avapro does, and talk about what other tests he wants to do. I had to stay home from work yesterday while my body adjusts to the new med. Makes me feel very spacey and weak. Today is now Sunday, and I’ve been on the couch most of the day. My heart feels like it’s doing cartwheels around my chest… and it scares me.

I don’t enjoy medical tests, particularly when they put me in jeopardy. All tests can have a possibility of causing problems, and I’m not doing well with facing more tests. But I do have hope that Dr. Wonderful can find out what is wrong with my heart and fix it, either with meds or (YIKES) some other technique. I want to be able to do what other people do… ride a bike or take a long walk with my husband without getting winded. I’ve never been one to be athletic because of feeling weak after a short while. It’s frustrating when my mind wants to do more than my body will allow it.

I have got to lose a lot of weight. I know that’s not helping. So… what I am facing is a total lifestyle change in more ways than one. I’ve survived without coffee now for a month. I have a friend who lost 50 pounds last year just cutting out carbs. I think I need to give that a go.

Ahhh, to think about spring and the new hope that springs eternal! Hope your spring is bountiful, floral and healthy!